


You Won't Steal My Heart

by Ailarii



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Robbery, it's bokuroo is what it is, the fuck is this even
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-30
Updated: 2016-10-30
Packaged: 2018-08-27 21:37:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8417779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ailarii/pseuds/Ailarii
Summary: Kuroo steals more than Bokuto's wallet.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you once again to [harmoniousdestruction](http://archiveofourown.org/users/HarmoniousDestruction) for helping me out with this one! And also kicking my butt into gear to even write it in the first place.
> 
> The fic is inspired by [this](http://benetnash.tumblr.com/post/151875177367/smooth-criminal) post. Because how could I not?
> 
> Enjoy

The numbers on the elevator’s screen ticked down until they switched from 1 to G, when they opened and Bokuto stepped out, heading in the direction of his car with his phone pressed against his ear.

“No, seriously, Akaashi, it’s adorable. The little baby sneezes and it’s so loud it, like, scares the mom awake.”

“Do you enjoy the fact that you get paid to watch videos of pandas all day?”

“Other animals, too,” Bokuto replied, sounding offended.

“Ah, yes, of course.”

Before Bokuto could say anything more, he saw someone step out from behind a concrete pillar, a gun in their hand, and they were pointing it at him.

“What the f - “

“Keep quiet and put your hands in the air,” the man said in a slow, smooth voice.

‘ _Y_ _ou’ve got to be kidding me,’_ Bokuto thought but did as he was told, pulling the phone from his cheek and holding it above his head. Akaashi’s voice came through the receiver but Bokuto wasn’t paying attention, being a bit distracted by the man in front of him.

“Where do you keep your wallet?” The man asked.

Bokuto swallowed and tried to compose himself, which was difficult since, first off, he was so scared he could shit a brick, and secondly, this guy was hot. A random, hot stranger was holding him at gunpoint and honestly it was making Bokuto feel a few things that he should probably address later. Mostly it was the scared shitless thing, though.

He pulled himself together enough to mutter, “Back right pocket.”

“Thanks.” The man then slowly moved around Bokuto, and as he passed by him he let his stone face crack into a smirk for a split second. Right before he reached into Bokuto’s pocket he said, “You look stunning, by the way.”

Bokuto spluttered and whirled around as the man snatched his wallet from his pocket. “What?”

The man winked and gestured with his weapon for Bokuto to turn back around. “Start walking, don’t look back and keep your phone where it is.”

Bokuto turned back and did as the man said. It wasn’t until he was in his car that he brought his phone back to his ear.

“Akaashi….”

“You just got robbed.”

Bokuto leaned forward and dropped his head on the steering wheel. “Yes, thank you, Akaashi. It’s not like I was there, or anything.”

“Then why are you still on the phone with me and not calling the police?”

Groaning, Bokuto leaned back and ran a hand over his face. “Akaashi, it was still in my wallet.”

Silence, then, “Come to the bar, okay? I’ll buy.”

Bokuto sighed and nodded. “Yeah, alright.”

After a quick stop at home to change and call his bank, Bokuto was heading to the bar he and Akaashi frequently went to. On his way, he couldn’t help but think about how it’d be at least a day before he got a replacement card, meaning he’d have to go to the bank in the morning to get cash, which meant waking up even earlier than usual.

Bokuto ran his hands through his hair as he entered the bar and looked around for his friend. Then spotting Akaashi, he strode over to the small table and sat down across from him.

Akaashi was quick to pass a shot of something over to him. Bokuto downed it quickly, then slammed the glass down, hissing, “Shit, man, what was that?”

“Probably what you need,” Akaashi said, taking a sip from his own drink.

With a nod, Bokuto conceded, saying, “You’re probably right. Got anymore?”

“Eat something first.” Akaashi pushed a basket towards him with a burger in it. “I know how you are at work with eating.”

Bokuto smiled in thanks and snatched up the burger. He was halfway through it when the door opened, the movement drew his eye from Akaashi and the sandwich fell from his fingers. He’d recognize that bedhead anywhere.

The man who’d robbed him was walking into the bar with a few other people, but that didn’t stop Bokuto from standing up and pointing straight at him, shouting, “Hey! You!”

“Bokuto, what in the hell are you - “ Before Akaashi could finish, Bokuto had vaulted clear over the table and launched himself at the man in the doorway.

“Fuck!” The man exclaimed, pushing one of his friends out of the way as he ran out the door.

“Kuroo, what the fuck is your problem?” His friend called after him. He was then shoved aside for a second time as Bokuto bolted out after the robber - Kuroo.

If Kuroo’s friends were following them, they quickly fell behind. Kuroo was rounding corners and weaving through alleyways so fast Bokuto was a bit surprised he could keep up.

But apparently being pissed off won out over being scared shitless because Bokuto was able to grab Kuroo’s jacket and yank him back, throwing him against the nearest wall and pinning him with an arm against his neck.

Gasping and catching his breath, Kuroo looked down at Bokuto. “What the hell, dude? Do you really want your wallet back that bad? There wasn’t even any cash in it, only cards I’m sure you’ve already - “

Bokuto cut him off, yelling, “There’s no cash but there _is_ a picture of my high school volleyball team that no one else has a copy of anymore!”

Kuroo arched a brow in confusion, then the words seemed to sink in and he replied, “Shit, seriously?”

“Yes, seriously. Now where is it?”

Kuroo huffed out a laugh before saying, “Back right pocket.”

Using his free hand to fish around, Bokuto quickly felt the familiar leather and pulled it out, opening it one-handed to assure the picture was still there. Seeing it was, he looked back up at Kuroo and backed away, letting him go.

Now Kuroo laughed properly. “You seriously chased me down, not knowing if I was armed, for a picture of your old sports team?”

Bokuto stuck his wallet into his pocket and shrugged, saying, “Well, I mean, I did have a bit to drink before you came in.”

“One to make bad decisions when drunk, are you?”

Eyeing Kuroo carefully, Bokuto asked, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Kuroo’s mouth pulled into that same smirk from earlier as he said, “Wanna head back to the bar and grab a drink with me?”

“What?!” Bokuto once again sputtered before finding the right words. “You - You expect me to say yes?!”

“I’ll pay.”

Bokuto paused to consider; if Kuroo was going to be shelling out for it…. “Fine. It’s the least you can do after robbing me.”

"Okay one, I didn't actually take any money, you were carrying like 4 dollars in dimes - the hell’s up with that, by the way?” Kuroo waved a hand around but shook his head, dismissing the subject. “And two, I saw where you work. Don’t play the victim here, I know you probably make more in a year than I’ve made in my entire life.”

Bokuto stayed quiet for a moment. The bastard kinda had a point…. But - “You pointed a gun at me!”

This time, when Kuroo laughed, he almost doubled over. “Dude, seriously? Spoiler alert, it was an airsoft gun. An unloaded airsoft gun.”

Blinking dumbly at him, Bokuto said, “What?”

“Bro, I robbed you today. You seriously think I have the money to buy a gun?” Kuroo asked as his chuckles died down.

“Well, I don’t know! You coulda, like -” Bokuto was grasping at straws, so instead of giving Kuroo the satisfaction of him admitting defeat, he started to stalk off.

Kuroo followed, eventually catching up and walking in stride next to him. “Good to know it’s realistic.”

Bokuto glanced up at him. It was his turn to laugh now. “You’re terrible.”

“Yeah, but your ass sure isn’t.”

Bokuto stopped walking. “What - I - “ He recalled earlier in the parking garage and bit his cheek to keep from smirking as he narrowed his eyes. “You pervert.”

Kuroo turned his head to look back at him. “Yup.”

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone is interested in a continuation of a more smutty nature, lemme know. Hope you all enjoyed whatever this was!


End file.
